Cell Phone Etiquette

I am a bit annoyed with cell phones lately. They are very convenient and helpful, but also quite intrusive. You can't go anywhere without hearing five different phone conversations or hearing five different rings going off. I'm tired of loud people talking on their cell phones. I don't want to hear your conversations. I don't want to know what you think about your boss or your girlfriend or your mother in-law. If you must talk, keep it short and sweet. Keep the public places public people! Respect the fact that not everyone cares to hear what you have to say. Also, a word about texting. I don't text. I know, I'm so behind the times. They probably teach texting instead of keyboarding in schools nowadays. I have seen people texting each other while sitting right next to each other. Yes, they were "talking" to each other via their cell phones texting as opposed to opening their mouths and speaking. Huh? And I have seen groups of teenagers walking down the street holding their phones up texting. I guess I just don't get it. And why do kids need cell phones? I managed to survive my childhood and teen years without a cell phone. It's nice to be able to keep tabs on kids, but if you don't know where they are anyway, having a cell phone connection isn't going to tell you either.

I have decided that the whole world needs a good lesson in cell phone etiquette. So here it is world:

• Don't answer your phone while eating in a restaurant. It's rude to the people you are eating with and rude to everyone else.
  
• Don't answer your phone in a movie theater. No, not ever. It's never okay. Especially when the movie has started. No, you can't even answer and whisper that you can't talk right now. I was in a movie once and of course a cell phone starts ringing (right behind me no less). Not only does the lady answer the phone, she speaks loudly and has a two minute conversation with the person. Seriously, that's not okay.


• Don't use your phone while using a restroom, either private or public. But especially not public. I was once in a public restroom when the person in the stall next to me starts talking. I had to listen for a second to see if she was talking to me. Nope, she wasn't; just talking on her phone ON the toilet. That is wrong on so many levels, and yes, seriously not okay.


• Don't use one of those head set thingies that just sit on your ear (I don't know what they are called), unless you are driving. When you come up next to me in the grocery store and start talking and I don't see your phone, I'm going to think you are talking to me and I'll probably respond and then I'll probably be embarrassed by the fact that you are talking to yourself on your imaginary phone in your ear and not to me.
  
• Don't use your cell phone to call someone in the next room. That, my friends, is what we call L-A-Z-Y. Get off your rear and go talk to the person-- in person.


• Don't drive and talk on your cell phone. Don't drive and text on your cell phone. Seriously.
  

Alright, now you know the rules. We can all get along.